In three words I can sum up everything about life. It goes on.
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Baby, be strong
July 24, 2009 || 2:39 PM
Should this tears, fall? Seriously, i have so much in my mind. So what should i do? Well, it's good if you know what i'm talking about. I bet, yknw.
I really love tajul. Can't you spare another chance? Please, i need him. His family. His friends. Just please help. i don't know how. Just help. Yes, i'm begging. For him. What should i do? I couldn't think straight. Who will be there for me, if it isn't jul? i don't want to lose him, so are you right? really, i don't know what to do. why is it happenin right now?
I was shocked, when i knew about this. I was in school, when suddenly Irah shouted "Eh!!", i was stunned. Shocked. My heart started beating twice as fast. I burst into tears. I couldn't help it. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't think. I really love you. Whatever happens, i'll always be there for you. but, ysee i don't know what to do. I'm super sad now. Who will make me laugh if it isn't him? I'm so worried. super worried. REALLY, WHAT SHOULD I DO NOW?
it's like, a day after 11 months. This happened. Who the hell tak tepranjat kan? da uh, i couldn't think about anything else.
Baby, it has happened. You're my hero. You're so strong. If you're reading this, i just want to tell you that i really love you. No matter what, you're the best. No matter what, we need to be strong. But i know, it's hard. You're the best, i ever had. I really love you. I won't leave you no matter what uh b. Please do update me if anything. I really love you, so so so much.
And i bet. The next person to ask me what happened, will see me crying instead. I couln't help it.
HAHA, Gone again ey?
July 17, 2009 || 3:27 AM
Sorry again, for the late update. When i'm home je, fetch-ed/waited for jul to send me home. That's like, already 3 plus eh. Tu kalau no plans after meeting him. Then, after surfing fb, abeh..time to get ready to go out. Time, 5 plus. I'll reached there in 45 mins, though it's during a peak hours. It's like my routine for these few days, or can i say it'll drag till weeks. Okay, from Tamp to City Hall, then to Novena. I swear i wouldn't have gone to hospitals, at this period, but because of my dad. So, without fail everyday i had to. Just that i want and need to see him. Ofcourse, it's tiring, balek skola, tak rest. But, it's worth it. I missed him so much. I'll update bout what happened, when i have the time peeps.
Where? I'm in school. Supposed to finish quarter of my coursework, but no. See what i'm doing? Blogging, obviously. Time? 12.17am. Finishing soon, i know that. I'm gonna msg jul soon, saying that i'm done. Meet him, somewhere. Yes, we'll be having "Finger Licking Good" for lunch. HAHA!
And, yes. I had a long talk with jul. Sweet, you know. I can sleep while listening to his voice, AWW! Kay, stop. I just wanted to say sorry, to..idk. I've not figure it out. Ala, you know who you are. Sorry for ydy's reaction, for real. Good that, you somehow you know. I hope you understand. Sorry. See, if i'm online, we'll talk more. Cause, i don't feel i have anything wrong with you. So.. yah. Done, baby? I've done it. WOO!
Bell da ring, BABYY!!!
Why must it be you, tmrw?
July 14, 2009 || 5:00 PM
It's been very hard for me to really go on with things around. Some good things, and some are just bad. I'll write evrything that's botherin me, even right now. I'll appreciate it if you really understand it.
Things have brought me to tears each night, before sleep. I am here, only by you. I was made by you. I grow older, with your pamperedness, love and care. You can't be compared by others cause you're the all time best in my own eyes. You hide things away from me to make me feel good, but did you care how deep it hurts when it's revealed? You loved me too much, that you didn't even want me to know nothing. I'm the only daughter to both my biological parents. Who do i have, beside both of you who brought me up? Thanks, dad. Lucky someone finally broke out of the promises and told me evrything. You know how shocked i was, at that particular moment? My heart beat twice faster, my eyes were so red. I thought i'd be strong, but i failed. I couldn't even look into your face, i couldn't. I couldn't believed those were facts, but it was. It happened. "The truth always hurts", i agree.
Every day and night, looking at you being my dad. I'm proud, to myself, to the whole world. You made a great impact to my life. I pray for you, always. Seeking for bravery for myself and yours. Picturing you smiling, was rather fantastic than you cry. Each night, before sleeping, i recalled evrything again.
- Remember, when we used to be only two of us staying with Nenek and all? Each time, aunt was raising her voice at you over some things, i'd cry.
- Remember, how was it like to stay together at our house? That you always loved. That you didn't want to moved out, but mom did.
- Remember, how was it like for you to walk every morning, with me sleeping on your shoulders? (when i were small)
- Remember when you told me you were hospitalised cause of something small, and i cried like as if someone's dying? That was the first time, knowing that you were hospitalised.
Ayah, thanks too for you being nice with Tajul. That day's lunch was interesting, with you and mummy together with Qai qai. It ended well too, by you saying " Jumpe lagi eh, jul" Thanks alot.
I think, that's it for today. I know, today wasn't that "normal" like others. Keep to your words, it hurts a thousand times. I hope, he does it. Mr Wai wang chatted with me thru fb saying, "I won't be coming to school tml as my nose is vey bad.. (all thanks to mahes's morning perfume)" Bayeeeek pe, HAHA!!
stupid nenehh!
July 9, 2009 || 5:30 PM
Ye la, when i'm in the mood to blog. It's either the comp or what is making some technical problems. Grr. Such a stupid comp. Seriously i cannot upload any photos to blogger, bayeek pe? Urgh. I'm done here. Err, see you facebook la deyy.
So long, comp's down .
July 7, 2009 || 9:08 AM
I'm still pissed off with Home's comp. Freaking sia, the Mio thingy went super crazy and we can't use net anymore. What the hell is that? And that too, the reason why i'm not updating my Blog/Fb and others. Well, i'm still gonna blog once everything's fine.
Currently, i'm at Hougang. I guess, next week too. No, just spending spend lil time with Jums, why not. The guy, that always i love most. Haha, i hope things gonna be better. You know, he must be strong with all those stuffs.